Wednesday, October 17, 2007 / 4:51 AM
Todae was quite boring at first..but it started to get more fun..hehe..had a "crazy" day with darl..Aft school (I'm too lazy tuh describe school..dat was how sian-ed I was feeling..xD), I went to Lot 1 and waited for her..I hate not having a phone ._. so I went home to call darl..and apparently, she have been waiting for me too..but on the other side..diao..xD by the tym I reached there (more lyk rush..xD), she was shoving her complains into my face..okay I did deserve it ._. hahax..then I met Steph..and we walked home with her..kinda..and reached Lot 1..went to buy A-cash first and then reminded darl bout my prezzie..xD then she told me to pick one..Oo lols..well ya for sum ppl, its rude or wadeva..but dats how I bought her prezzie tuh..It's beta dat we noe wad we're buying, coz we'll treasure it more..so we went to mini toons..on our way there, darl was eating her oreo mcflurry *drools*..then she lemme eat sum..and I wanted her to feed me..(juz joking..xD) and she did..and we were laughing..coz the ice-cream didn't enter my mouth..xD and when we reached there, I started to say, omgosh..all the stuff toys so kawaii^^ I wish I can buy every stuff toy there..xD Then I told darl dat I wanna check out other stuffs so I wud not miss buyin something dat I want..we went to another shop..and we saw kawaii turtles..I was so busy saying they're cute, I don't even noe which to pick..xD so we went back to mini toons and I bought the pooh dat I saw when we first went there..so kawaii^^ aft the prezzie-hunting (xD), we went to eat at KFC..so long neva eat there..then we ate and chatted abt school stuffs and our lives..when we were about to finish, darl's mum called her..xD so we hurried our way home..and when we reached there, darl's relatives were there..so I said hi to everyone and went into her room..god I miss her room..xD finally get to c my kawaii god brothers and sistas..xD they were playing with the lappy, but I wanted to top-up my A-cash, so I used one..then I bought the stuffs and changed my name..xD played with kor for a while..I was reminded of him when I was studying statistics juz now..and for the first tym, aft Mr Ong taught us statistics, we all slept..xD but one baka woke us up ._. I was having my beauty slp when something was tickling my ear..diao..3Ms, Mean, Mode and Median..hahax..mean..xD and he went on9 and asked y I changed my name..Oo lols..he was so bleh-ish todae..xD aft 1 game with him, I went home..I reached home and started playing and hugging my pooh..xD thank you so much Iqah! <3
Sunday, October 14, 2007 / 8:58 AM
Haven't been posting lately..so mani things happened in a matter of daes..I dono how I'm going to cope without him in my life anymore..I neva realised how much he meant to me, how much I loved him and how incomplete my life is without him..till he left me alone..Kissing him goodbye for the last tym on my birthday is something which rly pains my heart..Looking at his face, that once lit up when I told him I'll study hard for not only myself, but for him and my family..His face so soft, so peaceful made my tears flow in a matter of seconds..How he used to make me laugh, how he used to scold me, and then coming to my room to say that no matter how much he scold me, he loves me and wants me to do well..I once promised myself I won't eva cry for him if he eva scolded me again..but now, I juz cry..how much I miss him..how I wish I cud see him smile and hear his laughter..how I wish I cud hold him tight and neva letting go..An angel with wings caught him..and now, he's no longer around me to laugh with me, to joke with me, to be around me..A promise dat he made to me..to raise me up and c me grow..the promise dat made me cry coz he's unable to fulfill it..I noe I shud be happy dat he's gone, hopefully to a beta place..but it's too fast for me to accept it..how I wish I cud hear him wish me Happy Birthday..how I wish he can feed me my birthday cake and say he love me..lyk the years before..but now, he can't do dat anymore..I dono wad I shud feel rite now..happy or sad..He may have walked out of my life for good..but I'm glad he left footprints..without you within me I can’t find no rest..I pray for this heart to be unbroken..but without you all I’m going to be is incomplete..voices tell me I should carry on..but I am swimming in an ocean all alone..I don’t mean to drag it on, but I can’t seem to let you go..I never could imagine, life without you.. from the moment you walked into my world..never knew how long a loving flame could burn..but losing you has forced me to learn..that we can't change the way we feel inside..everytime I try to take a stand at all..I see your face again and I fall..Day after day, time passed away..and I just can't get you off my mind..night after night I hear myself say..why can't this feeling just fade away..there's no one like you (no one like you).. I can't sleep, I just can't breathe.. I don't wanna feel the way that I do, I just wanna be right here with you, I don't wanna see, see us apart, I just wanna say it straight from my heart: I miss you..living without you, will tear me apart..when you left I lost a part of me..It's still so hard to believe..I can't sleep at night when you are on my mind I wish I can turn back tym and say I love you one last tym..
The last tym
It never occurred to me,
That was the last time it'll be,
The last time we laughed,
The last time we went daft,
The last time you told me,
"When Mom Dad dies I'll be all you see".
Couldn't it be longer?
Why did it got shorter?
You were so precious,
I wanted to tell you good news first.
It was a shock to me,
I came home it was you I couldn't see,
My big brother whom I look up to,
I'm quite sure I'll miss you too.
I'll hope you'll take care of me from above,
I'll make your wishes come true to show my love,
And affection for the one I adore,
From above look at me soar.
You just had to leave God loves you well,
I'll just smile and pray May God save you from hell,
When I get older and think of you,
I'll think of all the mistakes that we both do,
It never occurred you'll leave me here,
Standing alone crying for someone I dear,
But I know you wouldn't wish me crying,
I'll smile and pray for you sighing,
I can't see your smile, your face, your eyes,
Where all my love for you lies,
Brother I love you and always will,
Take care of me Help my heart heal,
Cause I can't bear the thought you'll be gone,
I will be dark and all alone,
Brother be by my side when I need you,
Be with me cause...
That last time wasn't enough,
That last time it was too fast,
That last time.... I wasn't prepared.
This poem was written by Punk Jie or punkrockingeek..thank you so much for writing this beautiful poem for me..and I cried when I read ur poem too..thx for being with me all this while, giving me a hug when I needed it the most and above all, thx for being my bestie and sista..
